The little things in life

The little things are usually responsible for the biggest effects...lol...thought I'd start with an "obvious" quotable quote from smart old me. Seems like a perfect way to join the masses who have done songs, written poems, books about the little things in life
This piece will not be a rambling of an individual’s thoughts but more like a catalogue of little big things.
This piece is therefore conceived on the 3rd day of April, 2011...
a) Little thing numero uno....My daughter shouting "daddy"!!! @ the arrival hall as I push my cart arriving from a trip...slightly bashful but without inhibition...my love welled larger than if she had bought me a house ( won't mind that either). For one second I nearly didn't notice her mum walking assuredly behind her, with cockiness in her strut that said "it’s mine I don't need to run for it" hmmmm
That little “shout and run”, delivered by my little gal, is my first big little thing in this little dairy
b) The biggest fear people have is betrayal of a trust by giving away information.
"I need someone to talk to" is almost a cliched phrase but in an country where shrinks aren't popular that statement is one we should pay particular attention to.
How is this a little big thing?
Having a friend you can share something with and totally trust that its stays between the two of you is rarity ..rarer than coloured diamonds if you ask me. That's a little thing that makes a lot of difference.
I guess everyone reading this is asking the obvious question....do u have a friend like that? Are you a friend like that?

c) You take me for granted" my favourite, and I daresay the favourite of many. This seeming cliché is actually the end product of many different little big things; in itself it probably qualifies as a BIG thing not a little thing. I have shied away from listing making the actual little things that generate this sentiment because they are so individualistic and sometimes gender biased....
e.g. Forgetting your anniversary, birthday etc...male readers will go like ..... c'mon!!!,
changing the channel every time there is a soccer game ; female readers will most definitely say yes of course.
So I will leave you to let ur own personal "you take me for granted" reason run amok in your head for a while.
But let's focus on this little big thing and its effects for a while. Be it a friend, foe, brother whatever the relationship is, this issue raises hackles for both accuser and accused
So why do we do it anyway (take people for granted), is it a conscious or subconscious action? …. Can’t discuss it here however since this branches out into a whole new topic. Truth is the issue pops up on this list because it only happens between people with some form of relationship in which respect, love and care for the others feelings is assumed. This therefore leads to the generation of intense emotions and passions; making it a definite top three (if I was going to rank any of these)
d) A little bird whispered in my ear “my little big thing is when someone genuinely smiles at the things I say”…(I remembered to smile sweetly..not one to miss an opportunity ;-) )
That for me is another example of a really small thing that goes a loooong way. Its probably the reason why corporate leaders surround themselves with people they like, trust, people who listen to them (another little big thing; someone who listens to me). A smile is a sign of happiness, an indicator of “like”, an indicator that the other party is listening.

A number of little big things just came flooding in this morning;
• Your dog rolling over and asking for a belly rub;
• The person you believe cares about you tells you the meanest of things and believes they are simply telling you what they have on their mind. “this is what I think, you may agree or disagree” WTF!!!!!
• A kiss on the cheek from my daughter every morning when I drop her off at her Grandpas (yes I have a million little things about her, hope it tells you how crazy I am about her)
• The young man who lives with us at home, gives us a wave everytime we drive off to work in the morning
• My little girl saying “daddy should I change the channel to soccer for you, though I know she’s enjoying her cartoons
• Your doesn’t breakdown, simply drives till the next service is due ; reliability
• If you are a young person living at home with your parents; coming home to a peaceful place with Mummy and Daddy still happily married and alive to show you the love you need.

When I started writing this piece I said I won’t try to analyse the whys and hows of these “little things”, but I will leave this as a catalogue; this objective of this is to bring a smile to the your face if any of these serve as a reminder of sweet little things; or maybe a grimace at a painful little thing,
Whichever way this swings for you my prayer is that this piece serves to remind you;
1) not to take the little things in life for granted,
2) not to rubbish the little gestures that keep the wheels of life turning for you albeit almost imperceptibly.
3) To understand that it only takes a small deed or misdeed to destroy the other person’s life or simply the other persons day
4) That life is fleeting; here this minute, gone the next minute; so every minute is an opportunity to build a bridge, to take back a harsh word, to put a smile on another’s face
5) Treat those you consider to be friends with love, care and respect
6) Make few enemies and for the few you might make don’t make them an agenda item in your life

My desire for when I write is that I create thought starters born out of my own experiences, my joys and my pains …hope this thought starter puts a smile back on your face and enables you to put things back in perspective; focusing on the little special things that puts smiles on your friends face, if we all decide to provide the next person with a reason to smile what a wonderful world we will live in.
Not every change is revolutionary, so look for the little reminders in this short piece, it might just be the nugget to “buy” you and/or your friends happiness

reverse

When I decided to write down these musings of mine, the first debate I had with myself was whether to title it rewind or reverse; this is bcos my thoughts have been consumed by what will this world be like if we had the power to go back in time. I settled on reverse bcos it spoke to my wishes....and the wishes millions of us have probably had about 1 aspect of our lives or the other; the wish to go back and chose a different course. Rewind didn't cut if for me, seemed limited to going back and reliving de same moment(probably another piece altogether)
People often say Life is about choices; this statement is more profound than meets the eye...at least I think so.
So my question to all who read this is; if you could put your life in reverse at which points would u take a different turn?
The schools you chose to attend? (That is if you had much of a choice in that)...and the bigger question, how would that have affected your life. I must admit that this piece cuts too close to the tired question of predestination vs freedom of deciding your future based on your choices.
I have always believed in a compromise position on this question of destiny; which is what allows me to have these "useless" thoughts on life's reverse gear.
I believe every choice we make bodes for us a different destiny.....
Having shared that with you my next question will be?
Would you chose different if your reverse took you to the romantic moments in your life? This will include dating, flings and marriage.
Marriage is a particularly controversial one aint it? The regrets are more profound, since the decision is taken at a mature (hopefully) stage in life. It has particularly unnerving also because you live it for the rest of your life, unless school, work, dating, etc its terminal; till death do us part kinda terminal.
The job you do; also quite profound not just for the amount of money you make but also for your legacy as a person. How did you impact peoples lives. A doctor and an armed robber will have different legacies....only one of them can be truly proud of theirs.
The amount of time you spend with your kids and how you positively impact their futures through your upbringing of them.
I have a 100 reverse moments in mind but I am a lazy writer and I type on my balckberry :-(
At about this time I asked myself; isn't this a useless question? Since we all know there will never be a reverse option.......so what's the value of these musings?
Fact is; we do push into reverse periodically however it can only happen mentally. Trust me there is great value in reversing albeit merely a mental exercise.
I can't discuss the usefulness of reverse options without touching briefly on the forward option(yes another topic)
Understanding your reverse helps you make the right decisions when forward happens.....unless you die it will happen right?.
My object is for us all to go into reverse and ask ourselves will we take the same decisions? And use this in shaping our future decisions.......
Feel free to add to this piece, it is a living document